Giving Thanks

Four years ago today a small frail child was born.  The child was born premature and needed medical care.  Two days after her birth her biological mother made the decision for only reasons she knows to leave her small child at a local hospital.   This small child was hospitalized for two months where she gained enough strength to be transferred to the city orphanage where she was in an incubator for three months. On this day I think of the woman who gave birth to our daughter and hope that she may know that the small child she gave up is strong, healthy and happy today.  I hope that she has found peace.  I thank the hospital and orphanage that helped this small child gain strength.  I thank her first foster family for caring for her and giving her the love she needed to grow in the short time she was with them.  Because of all of these people our daughter became strong enough to enter Half The Sky’s nurture program where she formed a bond like no other with her caretaker that would care and love her for the next 30 months.  My daughters love for her Nai Nai (grandma) is so strong that she still aches for her Nai Nai’s arms.  I am thankful for her second foster family that showed this small girl all about family life, where she had a mama. a daddy, brothers and a sister. While with this family she was still able to see her beloved Nai Nai everyday when she attended the orphanage preschool program.  I am so thankful to everyone that touched this small girls life.  Because of them I have a spunky, strong, determined daughter.  My son has a sister that loves him to pieces.  My husband has a little girl who has him wrapped around her little finger.  She has grown from a small frail child to a beautiful strong little girl.

Happy Birthday Sweet Pea may your day be filled with love, princesses, Hello Kitty’s, and lots and lots of cupcakes.

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One month as a family of four

I can’t believe it has been a month since a scared little girl walked into our lives.  She was a very quiet and shut down little girl, that held tight to her little orion pie.  She didn’t really cry that much when the nannies left and she calmed down then it was more of a whimper, but a few hours later we had her laughing.  There have been many first for our preciouslittle one.  A new life and family.  She is no longer quiet and protest very loudly, did I say “very” when things don’t go her way, or she doesn’t get what she wants.

She has the cutest laugh and loves to play with her babies, I have washed, put lotion on the babies and diapered the babies about 100 times a day.  When I try to do something else with them she holds out her little hand shaking it while she says “no no no”.  She has started using more and more english words.  Now she will ask “more pees, water pees, no more, all gone, all done, stop it, sit down, up, down, she tells me gege is at school, will say go go go, shoes, and potty”.  She repeats most of what we say to her, and mimics everything we do.  She still gets very excited about food, and has most of her tantrums about food.  Some days she is very scared that we will leave her and follows me every step I make, I have noticed it is mostly on Mondays when Daddy goes to work and big brother goes back to school.  Poor little thing walks around watching every move we make and keeps darting for her shoes.

She has been sleeping with us and we have not had much sleep, we are usually woke up with a foot or a hand in the face.  So we decided it was time for her to have her own little bed.  I showed her the bed that I had picked out and she squealed with delight.  So the family headed out to IKEA, and the whole time we were in the story she would say “Mekaia ChewChung bed” and then she would squeal.  She couldn’t wait for Daddy to put it together, she checked on him many times, each time reminding us of who’s bed it was.  The DudeMan was also glad that she got her own bed, he has been very jealous that she is sleeping in our bed and has expressed that he will be happy when she is old enough to have her own room like him.  I thought that the excitement would wear off by the time it was bed time, but she let us rock her and then pointed to her bed, hoped in and 10 minutes later she was out, and Mommy and Daddy had a very restful sleep.

Big brother and little sister are finding their groove, they are interacting more each day and it is so beautiful to see The DudeMan be so gentle with her.  He lets her have things now without a fight and does things for her just because she wants him to.

The weather has been so nice, and she has loved being outside playing.  I had been thinking that I have to get a tricycle for her, so when I was driving home one day, there sitting at the curb was a tricycle and she was so happy.  She just peddles all over smiling and laughing.  We put the swings and slide on the play yard this weekend and once she made it through the grass, (I could tell she had not spent too much time walking in grass because she high stepped the whole time she was on it) she liked swinging until the dog a few doors down started barking, and then swing time was over and for about an hour so would say “no dog, no dog”.  We had a popsicle as a treat and she was a little unsure until she tasted the yogurt in the center.  Now we have a new popsicle lover.

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We are here…we are here

We have been home for 24 hours and we are finding our way.  I am sicker than I have been in years with a sinus infection, I can’t sit up longer than 2 hours at a time so this will be a quick post.  Today has been good and bad.  The boys went to the home depot workshop for some bonding time and when Daddy left it was not good.  I am only tolerated so when Daddy left she had a full on explosion.  I couldn’t take it being jet lagged and sick it was not my proudest mommy moment (I am not looking forward to Monday when Daddy goes back to work).  I couldn’t get her to understand that they were coming back.  She sat on the floor screaming scared to death with her jacket looking for baba or as she calls him mama.  I used the translator to tell her that he would be back, but she couldn’t hear it over her screaming, I walked her through every room to show her he was not home.  She won’t sit with me or let me hold her.  She just rolls and kicks on the floor.  After 45 minutes and her almost throwing up I caved and did the only thing I could to save us…I GAVE HER CANDY.  Boy did that get her attention and she stopped right away.  She wouldn’t sit next to me but would come by for the next piece of candy.  We did playdoh and then baba was back YHEA.  After that the day got better.  She has such a fun personality and plays well, but thinks everything is hers and has a fit when big brother wants his toys back.  We have many meltdowns and fun during the day.  She still will not let me put her down for naps or bedtime, but I am now allowed to be in the same bed after baba tells her mama too. Our little man is feeling so left out and I have been giving him extra love and time, I hope he doesn’t get sick from me.

Things we know about Miss M
She has the cutest smile and laugh.
She thinks everything is funny
She likes to blow her nose and likes to clean her face with a wet wipe (we have gone through boxes of tissue)
She likes things neat and orderly (sorry sweetheart)
She cleans up after she plays (I wonder how long that will last)
She only talks if it’s just us around
She is very stubborn (it runs in the family)
She loves lotion and lip gloss
She can eat her weight in noodles
She likes her clothes a certain way, and don’t even try short sleeves
She is happiest when she is eating or going potty
She gives the greatest hugs and kisses
She is not a morning person or afternap person and it takes her an hour to wake up

My brother in-law picked us up from the airport yesterday and we were greeted by grandma and auntie when we got home.  They had decorated the house with pink and had a few things for the kids.  It was so great to see them.  We were so sleepy and out of it I don’t even remember them being here.  I’m sure I was grumpy, after being up for 24 hours and thinking we would have to stop at the hospital on the way to the house.  My brother in-law cleaned our house for us and did a few projects while we were gone and I can not thank him enough.  He is the best cleaner/organizer, I didn’t even recognized my house when we walked in.  Thank you so much Jeff.

No one that meets her believes me when I say she just tolerates me so here is a funny story for you.  After we got home the husband went to pick up the cats and get some food, while he was gone I brought out the doll house to play with.  She was very excited and loved playing with the furniture and checked out each room.  She was most excited about the toilet (what can I say-going to bathroom makes my girl happy).  As I named and handed her the dolls, she took gege, meimei, and when I gave her baba she grabbed him, hugged him, cradled him and called his name many times.  What did she do with mama, she took her just so she could throw her out of the house not to come back in.  So there you have it I’m the doll looking in.   I know it will get better with time, but I want to be in that doll house.

Waiting for the Plane

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Day 3 Guangzhou

Today we went with another family to the island.  They are very nice and have a 11 year old son the looks alot like the DudeMan, he is such a sweet boy and the DudeMan and he seem to have fun together.  Their daughter is so cute and eats anything they give her.  Our Miss will only eat what she wants and if it is not to her liking will have a little fit and refuses to eat (she will only eat noodles, soup, sometimes watermellon and some rice if noodles are not avaiable)  We walked around in the rain, did some shopping and had lunch at Lucy’s before we had to go to the medical clinic to have the TB test checked out.  Her TB test didn’t make a mark on her and she passed.  I picked up some sqweaky shoes for her and she put them on once she heard them.  After that she only wanted to walk and even gave mama a kiss for them (with a little prompting).  The DudeMan did not do so well today, he had a major breakdown screaming and got very frustrated.  I stopped to help him through it and give him so hugs for input but he was so loud that my hubby came back for us and told us to start moving.  I didn’t understand until he pointed out the guards with guns coming towards us.  I don’t know what we would have done if they would have stopped us.  We decided to go back to the hotel so the DudeMan could decompress and stayed in for dinner which helped him alot.  We will start fresh in the morning and see were it takes us.  His therapist suggested I take him to the gym and I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before.

We are working very hard to get little miss to accept us both and now I am the only person to give her food.  When it’s time for her bottle she sits with daddy and I hold the bottle for her.  I can tell this girl is going to be trouble with a capitol T.  When daddy gives into her and gives her what she wanted she turns to me and smerks like I knew I would get it.  We tried having Baba tell her she needs to go to me, but that just seemed to push us farther away because she would do it and then run to daddy like I can’t believe you made me go to her.  So today we put her in a mini time in.  She started to throw one of her hissy fits because she didn’t want me to do something and I sat her down a few feet away, in less than 2 minutes she stopped her fit, it took her a little bit to came back to play with everyone but when she did she was happy and letting everyone play.   We take our oath in the morning and afterwards we are going to try and see some of the sights.  I have been emailing with a family that is here now and we hope that we can get together with them before we leave.

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Pictures from xian

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Pictures

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